Female-based abuse and violence have been quite an issue for some time now. Every once in a while, a news headline pops up that carries some really gruesome story about various kinds of vile abuses and violence being meted upon a specific female. And, this action is speedily condemned by some people, while some play the ‘detective’ role, trying to establish the reason for this in the first place; there is also the group that, despite how unbelievable this is, cheer on the abusers and try to make this problem about the female victim; and, of course, the indifferent folks who would rather not be bothered with the events that go on anywhere except their immediate environment.
Despite how much each of the parties up there may try to vehemently support their positions, we have to make one thing clear: women and children remain the most vulnerable in our society. It makes no sense that they have to be subjected to any form of abuse as a result of this vulnerability. The issue of rape, for instance, has been top of the list of the various forms of abuse most women are easily prone to experience. It is really sad that not just adults but female children also get to experience this vile action being meted on them by some individuals who feel it is ‘rational’ to take advantage of them based on their gender and sexuality.
Despite the law in place, despite the institutions established to look into the issue of various forms of female-based abuse and violence, it keeps coming up. The curves are not flattening, and life keeps getting more dangerous for our sisters, daughters, and mothers out there. So what do we do? Or rather, what are we not doing to ensure that the lives of our female folks are protected and the abuses they face are completely eradicated?
It starts with the family. The family is the smallest unit, yet the most powerful force for a society to grow. Parents have to instruct their children on the need to shun female-based violence. I am not talking about a one-time pep talk; make this a conversation that you must engage your kids in from time to time. Talk to them about the need to treat the female folk with respect and dignity. These lessons would end up being imbedded at the back of the child’s mind. Lessons like this should not be underestimated at all. The same way you talk to your kid or children about love and respect include the issue of female-based violence and abuse to them.
See – The Three Pillars of the Black Woman
Schools and religious organizations also have a role to play. While the schools are well informed on this issue, seeing as the curriculum has been updated from time to time to speak out against violence such as rape and physical abuse, religious organizations have a major role to play. I am going to be blunt about this: The fact that Prophet Mohammed married some underage girl centuries ago does not make it alright for you to have carnal knowledge of an underage girl right now! No God would wish for his creation to go through what a girl or lady or woman goes through while being violated against their desires or without their consent. It is wrong. And, our religious leaders must come forward and speak against this. The voice of the people is the voice of God; and the people are saying that the various abuses and violence which our sisters, mothers, and daughters face should be stopped. So, when you climb that pulpit, speak the mind of God; talk against female-based violence and abuse.
There is a great need to use the law as a tool to demand justice or restrain anyone that perpetrates these abuses against women. It is understandable that it takes great effort for women who have experienced these forms of violence to speak up about what they might have faced. However, the only way to get justice is by speaking up and getting the required legal services that would help you fight your cause. There are various legal NGOs dedicated to fighting the plight of women. Engage them in your fight for justice. Do not wait for someone to speak up then you go on and make comments about how you suffered similar actions. Speaking up goes a long way to put whoever abused you behind bars so that they would not get the feeling that this is right, and then go-ahead to keep doing it.
Finally, it takes a village to raise a child; it also takes a village to protect the child. This fight will not be won if we do not come together to fight it. Once a problem becomes a general problem, its solution is not far away. We must all see a single act of abuse or violence against any female as being our general problem. We must raise the awareness; we must speak against it; we must shun it; we must raise our voice to ensure that perpetrators of these actions are brought to just; we must not hide such perpetrators be them friends or kin; we must see the protection of our mothers, sister, and daughters as a collective responsibility.
